One day at the end of anatomy class the teacher announced that there would be an exam the next class, and all the students should spend a decent amount of time studying because this test would be worth more than all the others. "Teachers exaggerate about that kind of stuff all the time!” is what went through Bobby’s head when he heard the teacher announce the exam.
Some of the students had formed a study group and invited the Bobby to join. He thought that it couldn't hurt to study since he didn't have anything to do that night anyways, and maybe there would be pizza involved.
The night the study group got together Bobby’s friend Bryan dropped by to invite him out since there was a big party that night that he was sure Bobby would not want to miss. He was correct Bobby did not want to miss the party, and that there would for sure be pizza at this party. Knowing he was supposed to go to the study group, he texted Kyle, one of the members to let them know he would not be there.
Cheating was wrong and Bobby knew that, but he just kept coming up with excuses as to why it would be okay.
"It will only be this one time."
"I can't disappoint my parents, so I have to pass this class."
"I won't get caught."
"The party was way more important than this exam."
Cheating was wrong and Bobby knew that, but he just kept coming up with excuses as to why it would be okay.
"It will only be this one time."
"I can't disappoint my parents, so I have to pass this class."
"I won't get caught."
"The party was way more important than this exam."
The list went on and on. Bobby knew he should not have cheated, but he justified it with many excuses.
Bobby left class that day feeling refreshed. He got to go to the party, and he was confident he did well on the exam. Nothing was going to be able to stop him now. Well, that is until he got an email from the professor asking him to come speak with him in his office.
Bobby left class that day feeling refreshed. He got to go to the party, and he was confident he did well on the exam. Nothing was going to be able to stop him now. Well, that is until he got an email from the professor asking him to come speak with him in his office.
It turns out Bobby did not really get away with cheating like he had thought he did. He obviously was not very smart in how he cheated. Bobby took the answer from the student next to him word for word, so it was very obvious someone had been cheating. Not only did Bobby get in trouble for cheating, but so did the girl Sarah who Bobby cheated off of. Sarah had no idea Bobby was taking her answers, and they weren't even friends. Since she did not cover her work Sarah was also in trouble.
At that point Bobby was in trouble and he knew it, so finally he decided he would do what any decent human being would do. He told his professor everything and informed him Sarah was not involved at all, and she had no idea Bobby was looking at his exam.
At that point Bobby was in trouble and he knew it, so finally he decided he would do what any decent human being would do. He told his professor everything and informed him Sarah was not involved at all, and she had no idea Bobby was looking at his exam.
In the end Sarah was cleared of any wrongdoings, but Bobby was not. He was taken out of the class, and cheating will be on his academic record from now on. His parents were disappointed more than ever.
It looks like all those excuses he had didn't work out for him in the end. He might remember that for the next time.
Author's Note:
I have written my story based off of a fable I read this week, Jacobs 2. The Wolf and the Lamb (Perry 155). It is about a wolf wanting to eat the lamb and coming up with as many excuses as possibly as to why he should eat the lamb. None of the excuses were valid, and he ate the lamb anyways. I have changed my story up the lamb was innocent in the original story, and in my story the main character was not innocent. In my story the boy finds as many excuses as possible as to why he was going to cheat, and it didn't really matter he was going to do it anyways. The end result was going to be the same: he was going to cheat, and he was going to get caught. When the teacher caught him, the teacher did not care about any of his excuses because cheating and cheating with excuses is all the same. I think this is a good lesson for everyone to take with them. You should never cheat on an exam, and if you didn't study that is your own fault and you deserve the bad grade you are going to get.
It looks like all those excuses he had didn't work out for him in the end. He might remember that for the next time.
Author's Note:
I have written my story based off of a fable I read this week, Jacobs 2. The Wolf and the Lamb (Perry 155). It is about a wolf wanting to eat the lamb and coming up with as many excuses as possibly as to why he should eat the lamb. None of the excuses were valid, and he ate the lamb anyways. I have changed my story up the lamb was innocent in the original story, and in my story the main character was not innocent. In my story the boy finds as many excuses as possible as to why he was going to cheat, and it didn't really matter he was going to do it anyways. The end result was going to be the same: he was going to cheat, and he was going to get caught. When the teacher caught him, the teacher did not care about any of his excuses because cheating and cheating with excuses is all the same. I think this is a good lesson for everyone to take with them. You should never cheat on an exam, and if you didn't study that is your own fault and you deserve the bad grade you are going to get.
"The Wolf and the Lamb" by Joseph Jacobs, from The Fables of Aesop. Website:Un-Textbook.
Text message between Bobby and Kyle
Source:Fake Phone Text
Boy cheating on Exam
Source: The Sanity of A Mad Woman
Text message between Bobby and Kyle
Source:Fake Phone Text
Boy cheating on Exam
Source: The Sanity of A Mad Woman
Hello Baylee. I really enjoyed how easy it was to read through your story. You did a great job of building the setting of the academic environment and the pressures that many students feel while taking classes. There was only one aspect of the story that did not flow too well. In the sentence where the student sits next to a student that had studied you wrote, “He knew that had study”. Just a little thing I noticed.
ReplyDeleteI liked how you portrayed the thoughts of a student and the excuses that went through his head while he was justifying cheating. I believe this story stuck out so much to me, because I am a member of the Integrity Council at OU and unfortunately we see this far too often. The only thing that I think you could add into the story is a little more detail about the student’s dreams and even what class they are in. This could help paint a better picture of the level of difficulty in the exam and the pressures that he feels from feeling that he will not achieve his goals.
I think adding what class the student was in would have been a good addition to the story. Thanks for the advice!
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHi Baylee!
ReplyDeleteReading your story, I definitely like the plot and how you took the idea from the original story and made it your own, however I think it would be cool to add something more like a character's name, his friend's name, more dialogue, or more information on his surroundings and his life. I could definitely see this story be expanded; you could even add an unexpected twist somewhere like at the party he went to. Something crazy could have happened to affect his being able to get to class on time or anything like that. Possibly like a mini story within the story.
Some small things that I noticed was that in your first sentence I think the "has" should be the past tense "had." Also, like Justin commented, in your sixth paragraph I think the last sentence could be reworded a bit. I feel that you could add more detailed word choice as well. This would bring the story more to life. Other than that, good job! I look forward to reading more of your stories!
Hey Baylee,
ReplyDeleteThis story portrays a really important moral that a lot of people need to understand. I know so many people that do the same thing as this boy from the story and they don't understand how bad this can be. Cheating is a big problem and even if it's not directly cheating on a test, even not holding up a part in a project or using other people's study notes doesn't help that person in the long run and they need to learn on their own. I like how your story was laid out and easy to read. You also put this story into a way that can easily be read and is a common problem, especially in college and high school.
In your story "The Boy With Excuses," there were many great dynamics. Overall I enjoyed it, and felt I could see this happening in real life. People do not always think of the consequences of their actions and how it might effect others.
ReplyDeleteHere is one of my suggestions; would Bobby have cheated like he did? What I mean is, do you wonder if he would of thought, "Copying word for word is a bad way to cheat." It is pretty obvious that if you copy word for word that cheating is happening. So, maybe just choose a different way of cheating that wouldn't cross his mind? I feel like he'd be a little smarter than that.
Lastly, maybe you could add come dialogue to show the seriousness of the repercussions of cheating. Bobby's parents could yell at him. The professor could call him out during the exam. Anything that raises the stakes would work.
This story had a great plot and the topic by itself gave me goosebumps. This was a great choice and keep up the good work!
Hi Baylle. I really like how you went through and made the original story into a story that we can all relate to. The struggle between choosing to studying and doing other activities is something we all go through every day! Also you confronted a huge problem with cheating on work whenever we decide to take shortcuts because we decided to do something other than study. I like that you gave a good amount of detail into his past to give the reader a sense of why he doesn't feel like he needs to study. I think it would be a positive change for you to tell how he cheated on his exam before he gets caught. I wasn't able to tell if he had cheated on the exam or if it wasn't as hard as he previously thought. Overall I really liked reading your story and would like to see the future stories that you add to your portfolio.
ReplyDeleteHi Baylee!
ReplyDeleteI love how you took this fable and modernized it. You made it into something that I could actually see being featured in a children’s story. Also, I love that you used a screen shot of a text conversation as your image. This is something that everyone can relate to since everyone nowadays uses text messaging. But it also made me wonder that since that conversation is so specific to your story did you make one of your friends play along so you could use the conversation in your story? If so, that is so awesome way to be an overachiever haha. There were a few grammatical errors but the comments above covered most of the minor corrections. I just really liked your story because the moral of it is so strong. It doesn’t matter how many excuses you have what’s wrong is wrong. Great job and I look forward to reading more of your stories!!
Hi Baylee,
ReplyDeleteWhat a creative way to tell your story. I love how you just took the theme of the story and retold a totally different story. I really think that is such a good and creative idea. I also love that you added a screenshot of a text message. I think both of those elements really added a modern twist to the story. I also think your story was really easy to follow and understand. I really enjoyed reading your story and seeing how you changed the story and retold it. I think that is such a good idea. Changing the story to a more modern approach made it easier to follow and relate to. I think you really did a great job with this story post. I really enjoyed reading your story and good job and I can’t wait to read more of what you come up with.
Hi Baylee,
ReplyDeleteYou did a really good job modernizing this fable. I appreciated how in-depth your author's note is. I think you made this story extremely easy to relate to. Everyone seems to be at a cross road of having fun and doing what is responsible. I really liked the text message that you added to the story. The comments have covered most of the minor issues I have noticed. You've got a strong portfolio going for you. Good job and I look forward to seeing where you go with the rest of your stories.
Nice retelling! You put the story in a modern day setting that your readers, us college students, can easily relate to. I haven’t read the original but based on your Author’s Note it looks like you managed to keep the overall message the same. My friend had a cheating incident similar to this. She let one of her good friends borrow a lab report that she wrote. They said they just needed some help writing it but they ended up copying it word for word. She got into a lot of trouble at first until, like in the story, the cheater said she had nothing to do with it. Cheating is such a big deal in college! We have all thought about doing it so that we can get a better grade, but I for one have been too scared of the consequences to risk it! Good job on your story!
ReplyDeleteHello!
ReplyDeleteI thought that your rendition of the wolf and lamb story was really creative. I love when fables that contain animals acting like people are transferred into real human terms. I did that with one of my storytelling posts as well. The Fables seem like metaphors for our lives anyways, I think that is why it is so easy to envision them in our lives today. I thought that you developed the characters very well, and that you put in little details that made the story really great.
My favorite part of your story was actually the image of the iPhone text conversation. How did you do that? I can tell that you really put effort into making this story thorough and that makes it even better. I might have to take that idea and run with it somehow. Of course, I'm not going to cheat because I just read about the consequences of that in the story hehe.
Hi baylee,
ReplyDeleteI really like what you have done with this story. you really made it your own. I think that it is very relatable to all of us because i am sure we have all had a time where we did not want to study. the part about the pizza made me laugh because i would totally go to a study group if they had pizza. ahh the good old ill study in the morning. that one never pays off. i really can tell that you put a lot of thought in to this because it is written very well. I also like how at the end his parents were even more disappointed in him than they would have been if he just did bad cause he got kicked out of class. haha that picture that you put on there is very creative i like that you even went as far to put anatomy. good job and keep up the good work.
Hi Baylee!
ReplyDeleteI chose to read your portfolio this week. The title got my attention. As a parent I thought I would be reading a story about a younger person. When I realized I was reading a story about someone who is technically one of my peers I reread it. At any age and during all kinds of circumstances we can face what Bobby went through. Sometimes college can really school you in learning about things the hard way! I think most people can identify with the issue that Bobby had to face.
I like the author's note that explained how you change the innocent to guilty. I like how you said that the person didn't deserve to have an excuse be valid and that the person should just admit they deserve a bad grade. It would be much easier in life if we just owned our choices and not have to cheat or lie to try to make it a valid choice.
I really like the choice of background you chose. It is refreshing, it reminds me of summer and it is November right now. I can almost taste a fruit punch slushy from the colors!
Hey Baylee,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed the easiness of your writing, which made it really easy for me to read through your story. It was interesting seeing how you chose a classroom setting for the story and incorporated the excuses made by the boy to cheat. The story is very relatable because I am sure that the whole party experience thing has happen to most of us who are in college. So it gets you thinking that there is really no excuse to something bad. I always see things as if I do something then I am willing to pay the consequences. If you are not willing to pay the consequences then your priorities are somewhat messed up and you need to fix them as a person. So in reality if you ant something like good grades then you have to be willing to put everything aside and reach your goal. However, going back to your story good job! I really enjoyed it!